Nolans Pregnancy Reaction

Dude you are expecting!!!! Holy cow man, do you know yet whether it is a boy or girl? In case you already haven't noticed, your wife is ready for the ultimate emotional rollercoaster. You think throwing the phone downstairs was bad? Get ready for the computer monitor, or the t.v, or three quarters of your precious moments collection, which takes longer so it is a bit more satisfying. The best advice I can give you is the bumper sticker I should have: GET IN, SIT DOWN, HOLD ON, AND SHUT UP.
From this day forth for about a year:
1. Everything is your fault. Absolutely everything, from the house being to small, to the T.V. reception being bad, to it raining outside.
2. Learn to swallow your pride, what little you managed to hide in the precious moments boxes.
3. Learn to say: "Honey, I'm sorry. I'm a big fat oaf. I haven't spent my whole life preparing for this moment.
4. You do not have enough money.
5. Babies 'R Us is evil and will consume all money destined for Best Buy and Home depot.
6. You will become excited over super absorbant Pampers.
7. Instead of the usual fantasies, you will have fantasies about curling up in a big comforter and getting 5 solid hours of sleep.
8. Your wife while currently being only one of Satan's minions, will become his warchief. But don't worry, she will return to normal maybe a year after childbirth.
9. You will become proud to call the garage your space to do whatever you want with (as long as the cars fit).
10. Every nurse/doctor/health care professional has different advice for everything.
11. Having a child will not be like anyone told you it would, but it will be awesome.

Hang in there man, you are in for it. It will be great though. Keep reminding yourself what your wife is going through, and that will help you understand why she is the way she is.