To Be Road Kill

So I'm rollerblading to work today and I come upon a hidden driveway. Two cars come barreling out. The first car turns left, which is no biggie. The next car veers right and doesn't even look to the right. Instead she's looking to the left to watch for on coming traffic. All the while I'm trying to get my fat ass to stop cuz I know she isn't stopping for me. Since I was already in front of the car the only thing I can do, is do a 180 turn and try and get out of the way. Know imagine a fat ass trying to get turned around really quick on rollerblades. So I get turned around but she's hitting the accelerator, there's no way I'm getting out of this one. So the car is a couple feet away and I'm thinking about what it'll feel like to be road kill. Will I finally be granted my wish of being thin once again? Will I stink as I rot along with rest of the road kill? Will someone think enough of me to at least kick me to the curb? Will someone think I'm an old poster from an 80's rock band? I wonder what the 2D version of me looks like? (Kind of amazing how many thoughts one can get through the head in a short amount of time) And finally the lady turns my way and slams on the brakes. My hand grazes the hood of the car and the road kill version of me is averted. At this point I'm not quite sure who crapped their pants worse me or her. I'm sure she didn't car about me, rather she didn't want her car scratched.